You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
