I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
