hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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