It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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