I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
