and you said cock pushups were impossible
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
