oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize
