Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
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I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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