also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
