btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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