Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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