party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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