New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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