all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Randomize
