I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize
