Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
