Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
