ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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