it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Randomize