last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
you would pick up someone in the library
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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