Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
