he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize