I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
