so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
