Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
