Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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