I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize