This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Randomize
