I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
