If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
