She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
do nipples grow back?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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