Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Randomize
