Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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