So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I think a kid would responsible me up
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize