Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize