I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize