woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
