Life is so much better after having sex.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize