I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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