Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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