he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
