Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
