I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
