I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize