Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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