I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
