hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
