Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize