don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
