She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize