Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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